The below is a guest post from blogger Amy S, who writes How Not to Be a Jerk and hails from Australia. I love Amy’s list and especially her chosen photo accompaniments. 

Dear Fierce Gentleman blog,

I had the pleasure of being shown your website by a rather excellent gentleman just the other day. I especially enjoyed the list of 10 qualities that make you a Fierce Gentleman. After reading it, feeling inspired and knowing that it inspired my gentleman friend also, I realised that although many of the aspects can be related to both men and women, it would be nice to have a feminine specific version to look at and maybe aspire to.

I searched through your blog at the different posts aimed at women but they were all about how to be a lady for a Fierce Gentleman as opposed to being a Fierce Lady in our own right. I thought I’d address this imbalance by trying to spell out a few factors that might lead to a woman being considered a Fierce Lady.

The Fierce Lady (or from now, F.L.) is comfortable with her gender. She does not apologise for doing stereotypically feminine things or for sometimes acting in a more masculine sense, because she is aware that there is nothing wrong with either of these things. She also does not condemn other women by saying “I’m not like other women,” as though all women are one and the same.

2: A Fierce Lady is Personable

Where other people may struggle to be sociable or inclusive, the F.L. is always looking for opportunities to meet new people and include outsiders. She is friendly, polite and amusing to all the varieties of people she meets.

3: A Fierce Lady has Style

F.L’s are comfortable experimenting with fashions and trends without compromising her own unique style. She is well put together, comfortable and appropriate to the situation, although she is rarely worried about what others will think. This extends to all aspects of appearance, including make-up, hair, body alterations, or however she chooses to appear to the world.

4: A Fierce Lady is Chivalrous

Chivalry is not dead, it just got lost. The dictionary defines chivalry as the qualities idealized by knighthood, such as bravery, courtesy, honour, and gallantry toward women or a manifestation of any of these qualities. In our lovely modern world, I think we can lose the ‘toward women’ part. Bravery, courtesy and honour are not gender specific. We should be holding doors open for each other, and allowing every stranger common courtesies regardless of gender. A F.L. understands this and both accepts and performs chivalrous acts in her daily life.

5: A Fierce Lady Accepts Other Ideals

These points are not blanket rules. A F.L. will realise this and not condemn other women or men for not following the same pattern. There are fierce ladies, feminine ladies, nurturing ladies, gregarious ladies, overtly sexual ladies, masculine ladies and all sorts of combinations of the above. No ladies need to confine themselves to any one way of living, as long as they are happy and don’t intrude on the happiness of others.

6: A Fierce Lady has Opinions

Being well-read and up-to-date on current affairs that relate to her passions is how a F.L. is able to articulate and be secure of her own opinions. She may be political, creative, scientific or motherly, but she knows that her opinions on that area are sound. However, she always listens to opposing opinions and adjusts her own when she comes across good arguments and new ideas.

7: A Fierce Lady Loves Love

Love is a pretty excellent thing. The F.L. never feels unworthy to accept love from her partner, as she always returns it with full and equal strength. She loves fully and completely extending it to family and friends as well as her chosen lover, whether or not it is a ‘forever love’ or a ‘perfect right now love.’  She is secure in and of herself.

I would never say that these are perfect rules or that they couldn’t use some tweaking here and there. I also wouldn’t say that anyone could be all these things all the time. I do think it is a nice thing to strive for and I will do until my next leaf turn and I start to admire something exciting and new. For now, I would just like to submit this as a possible opposite side to the Fierce Gentleman coin.

If there are any things I’ve missed or that should be added, please let me know in the comments. Fierce Ladies do appreciate other opinions after all. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to go be excellent.

Yours femininely,

Amy

Related article: 10 Qualities the Fierce Lady Embodies

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Also published on Medium.